Sleep paralysis visited me last night, it feels like I was awake but I am not and as expected I have struggled many times to wake up. It feels like I woke up and then I was back again into sleep state and will struggle again to open my eyes. I felt so ice cold that I am trying to turn off the electric fan and I am trying to reach it out so I could wake up, and when I finally wake up, I was startled why I felt icy cold when it is very warm and hot. Does it mean, my body is already losing its warm and I am already leaving it? Anyway, with the little strength I have I forced myself to wake up and get off the bed, went to the bathroom and wash my face and tried not to sleep again because I don’t know if I could wake up myself again.

[Photo courtesy of Larisa-K/pixabay.com]

Yes, I was so scared to sleep again that I don’t want to close my eyes but due to tiredness I fell asleep and dream. I have seen myself with classmates somewhere, we are holding an umbrella and it wasn’t clear to me if everyone is wearing black. In our back there is a small tiny shack at the foot of the hill, there’s water running, making the ground wet and then my dream hop seeing myself and classmates getting inside our grade 3 classroom but the teacher was different it wasn’t our adviser but another teacher in the same grade. She was very happy and teary eye for us visiting and remembering, she was also thankful to our class president and when I went near our teacher she hardly remember who am I and my dream ended.

In the blink of an eye everything can change. So forgive often and love with all of your heart. You never know when you may  not have that chance again.

When I wake up in the morning I have asked my mother if I am trying to turn off the electric fan because I would like to know if it was a dream or I was really trying to do it. She said yes but I wasn’t satisfied with her answer because I would like to know more of what I did in my sleep state, but as expected they didn’t understand what I had gone through and even gets angry for asking too much details. Nobody is willing to listen, they care less about my story so I told them someone is already dying beside you but they don’t even know and they couldn’t even care.

Oh, should I also mention that the previous night my mother dreamed that I die, someone told her in her dream that I am already dead.

This wasn’t the first time I had sleep paralysis, back in Korea in our old apartment every night or any time I slept in the day I have nightmares and sleep paralysis, I had a sleep deprivation that time because I was too scared to sleep.

Today, is the first Sunday of the month so the service started 7 o’clock in the morning. Pastor E topics is about the “The Call to Discipleship” based on Matthew 4:19 when Jesus invited Peter and Andrew to follow him to be fisher’s of men.

[Photo courtesy of relationaldiscipleship.wordpress.com]

Pastor E encourages the congregation to strengthen their faith and live like Jesus wanted His children to be, to follow Him and live on His words. He also discuss about Jesus invitation to Peter and Andrew,  he said it was not only for them but for everyone. Peter and Andrew followed Jesus without hesitation, they trust and became obedient.

[ Tagged In ] A Blessed Sunday, Church, Church Service, Sunday Service

The other day while I went out to return the broom outside, I saw a woman carrying a baby on her arms. She first went to my aunt store then talk to my cousin’s wife and when she saw us in our porch, she offered a bottle of honey. I have thought of buying honey a few weeks ago so my father could drink calamansi juice with honey to cure his colds and cough but I don’t know where to find a seller and the woman showing in our house with a bottle of honey is an answered prayer. She is selling the bottle of honey for ₱150 about $3.20, we asked her if it was a pure honey and we are told it was and it was the only bottle she got. We could test it we don’t believe her; anyway we bought the bottle of honey without testing.

When my father arrived in the afternoon I have told him that I bought a bottle of honey for ₱150, he said it was too expensive because he thinks my older cousin’s wife was selling bottle of honey for ₱60 ($1.31) only, my older female cousin who was at home seconded but she thought that is cheaper than the amount my father mentioned. Well, I have thought buying it for ₱150 was already a steal since it was hard to get pure honey these days.

Anyway, when they look at bottle of honey I bought they concluded it was pure honey since it was very sticky and dark yellow in color unlike the honey that my older cousin’s wife reselling from the island where she is working it is blunt in color and watery in texture.